Monday 5 December 2011

We grew up together: swimming pools, locker rooms, penis fights - it just happens.

Watching: Hawaii Five 0, which featured a nice moment for uber-butch Dano - a character whose whole deal is that he's a guy who came to a city he hates and doesn't understand because he misses the daughter he views as the only good thing he's done with his life - when he pretty much cries in front of his equally butch partner while they watch the birth scene in Enemy Mine, and later when he mentions in passing the reason for his hating Hawaii is because the elderly dog he lost to his wife during their divorce died during the quarantine process. I wonder if there's a long game character arc in play right up until two cast members of Heroes act like they should know each other and then the cops hop on MX bikes to scramble into the jungle "looking for clues" because it's not like jungles are big places or anything. Anyway, they find a parachute and some motorbike tracks nearby and conclude that someone parachuted to the exact spot in a jungle where they'd stashed a bike earlier, and you know what? That's cool, Hawaii Five 0 - this is why I come here, and not to be ambushed by genuinely charming character moments.
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1 - so that was a Harry Potter film, was it? I sat through the other six thanks to having enough younger relatives to not have much choice in the matter, but this was a joyless film. Made a billion bucks, all the same, so I don't much suppose my thoughts about it matter much, but I thought it was very slow and wondered why the Harry/Hermione naked make-out scene was in there. Seemed a bit... pointless, narratively, and that whole "we need to find the seven Dragonballs" thing from the last film runs into this one, but then gets sidelined in favor of "we need to find these other three Dragonballs as well, and also the Dragonball sword of +15 armor negation" But there's a billion reasons why I am wrong about this film, so let's just move on.
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: part 2 - in which my maths might be a bit rusty, because Harry destroys four of the seven previously-mentioned magic McGuffins and then announces "we have to kill the snake - it's the last McGuffin!" But hey, whatever. It was all a bit alienating, to be honest, and no-one and nothing ever really clicked as human and relatable on its own terms but then this is the eighth film in the series so I don't suppose it had to be accessible, or so runs the logic even though Son Of Godzilla was the eighth in that series and still managed to be accessible to noobs and yes, I do hold the Godzilla franchise as a yardstick for quality in this instance, the only question is why I don't do so more often. Godzilla would totally save this film from being boring, but as it is, it's basically a tv show's season finale with deaths of no-marks all over the shop and the sets getting a bit singed to show that The Game Has Changed, and as usual Hollywood types have to go messing with the original plot from the book by changing characters around and even tacking-on a terrible ending set in the future. Awful, but I suppose the kids that grew up with the films/books liked it for the sense of closure it brought to... something or other. It kind of just finishes, to be honest. Eh.

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