I blame Spartacus for making me think "oh good, John Hannah is
in this" when his name pops up in the credits of something or other,
but his presence couldn't save the movie Alleycats -
at least, I assume he couldn't save it as I could only manage eleven
minutes and ten seconds of it before the cast became unbearable to
watch. When they start whooping and driving their bicycles like a bunch
of twats around London streets I just thought "no" and turned it off.
To put some perspective on how unlikable they are, I am actually a
cyclist myself, but the young actors in this did just too good a job of
playing a bunch of cunts.
To be fair, the makers work hard to make
you turn the film off, as one of the characters is a smoker, and given
the rarity of smoking onscreen these days to reflect the real world, you
know this is an aesthetic choice, and that the makers think this will
make their character an edgy outlaw from the off rather than simply
letting the audience know that the character is smelly and doesn't care
much for the concept of personal space.
Basically, Alleycats is a movie for people who hate cyclists and don't want their worldview challenged.
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