Monday 4 October 2010

This is an emergency - I'm Chuck Norris

Another wasted day on Dead Rising 2, which became less fun when the green gas bits started, but still a bit of a laugh. Managed to make a start on drawing in the evening, though, and caught up with Burn Notice, which has for some time now been a show I'm not entirely sure why I watch. Yes, it's got Bruce Campbell in it being Bruce Campbell, but - and this is possibly what I should have taken more notice of - Bruce will play in any old load of shit (a bit like Lance Hendrickson) and his presence is not a guarantee of good times ahead even if he has starred in some stone-cold classics down the years, and there's probably a good argument to be made that he picks stuff knowing full well he'll likely be the best thing about it. So while Burn Notice has Bruce Campbell, it conversely has the main character telling you at least four times an episode about being a spy, usually in a monotone voiceover informing you how being a spy is like being a gay man in Texas or something because no-one believes you when you tell them and then they treat it like a hilarious joke allowing you to slip past their defences and have your underfed fake Oirish on-off girlfriend blow up their car so they think the feds (played by Bruce) are on to them because them thinking this will make everything turn out okay - this is pretty much the plot to every episode so far, even the ones where they get angry at child abuse. Agh.
It is not a good show.
Also watching Rambo: the Force of Freedom, which is quite sublime by dint of association with the source material, but daffy enough on its own terms to bear a watch, like when he just somersaults down some stairs rather than walk, or when bad guys wander through what looks like Iraq while saying "so this is the Bronx". It's just mad and doesn't even seem to be trying, a bit like Chuck Norris and the Karate Kommandos, which is every bit as insane as you think it is, with Chuck fly-kicking a ninja in the face from his mount - a dolphin - which he then commands to "guard the entrance" and it does. At one point a NASA security chief waves away Chuck's security concerns by saying "Not even a fly could penetrate my defences!" and the completely straight-faced payoff to this line is one of the greatest things I have ever seen:

It is probably now one of my all-time favorite tv shows.

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